Archives for November 2015

My birthday week: my secret beliefs + an invitation

As I approach my 42nd birthday, today’s Love Letter is a sharing from my heart about a few things I have learned about money and life and purpose over my past 20 years of questing.

42 has far more significance to me as a turning point moment in my life than 40 did. At 40, I still didn’t feel close to the wisdom of an elder. Today, I do. I can feel the shift from seeker to wisdom keeper more deeply than ever.

In the Kabbalistic tradition, 42 is the number with which God created the Universe. And, so many others have ascribed special meaning to the number. I’m experiencing the visceral understanding of why. Perhaps, I can share some of it with you.


I’m writing this as I drive down to the hot springs with a few close friends to celebrate my birthday. Then, on Tuesday, I’ll be up in the Bay Area to attend an exclusive Love School session with one of the trainers from the ultra-successful Tamera community in Portugal.

I truly wish this freedom and flexibility for everyone. It’s my birthday wish, in fact.

It’s why I do my work in the world.

You see, I have come to see that most of us (including me for so many years), are living lives of pure survival. We live in a Universe of “have to” with little experience of “get to” or “want to.”

From a place of survival, following my heart seemed incomprehensible. Yet, I professed to want a heart-based world. How could I possibly live in a heart-based world of abundance from a place of scarcity or survival.

I couldn’t. And neither can you.

If we truly want to live in a world where there is enough for everyone, we must discover where there is enough for ourselves right now.

I believe that happens when we each know how to ask for what we need in exchange for what we have.

Some folks have an issue with my use of the word “need” — my answer to that is that we cannot move to want until need is met, so see it as a step in the direction we want to go and the first step to living a life of Desire. (If you are one of the lucky ones who already have “need” met and can see that through the collective money dysmorphic culture we live in, you can learn to receive what you want, not just ask for what you need.)

The key to you having this kind of flexibility and freedom, beyond a life of survival, is being able to clearly offer your gifts in multiple ways or in just the one right way that feels best to you (either in a minimal amount of time so you have plenty of time for relationship or in a way where relationships and work are fully merged so you can’t tell which is which).

When as many of us as possible are living beyond survival, the world becomes a far better place.

Today, I am giving thought to how this worldview and my Desire to help as many people as possible step into lives of empowerment and possibility intersects with the realities of a world at war.

As the terrorists bomb Beirut and Paris, I know the answer is not to allow the actions of war to distract me (or you) from a life of peace.

All we can really do that has any impact is recommit to our own quest for harmony and peace within ourselves and in our individual realities.

By doing this, we will build the parallel universe we want to live in, incorporating the ancient wisdom into this new age.

Does this mean not to have compassion for those who are suffering? Absolutely not. It means to use your compassion to fuel the fulfillment of your own life purpose, even more.

You are here for a reason, I know it. I suspect you do too and you are somewhere along your journey of discovery.  It’s likely that your lack of economic freedom is creating resistance for you on your journey.

The good news is that, if that’s the case, you know the next step on your path. Be willing to enter or continue the quest to earn an income in alignment with the life you truly want. If you aren’t experiencing that yet, it’s the worthiest goal you can seek to attain next.

You will find yourself along the way. You will almost surely step onto the road less traveled. And you can do it while fully integrating all of your parts, masculine and feminine, naive and wise, playful and sage.

If that means building yourself an income that will support you to get to Greece to support the refugees coming ashore, do that.

If it means, staying in your current “here” and building the infrastructure to support your local community (yourself, your immediate family and local friends), do that.

If it means, finding a job that gives you the time and space to go within and do the inner work necessary to find your big “D” Desire, do that.

For my 42nd birthday, I invite you to join me here, out on the edge, on the road less traveled. If you are coming along, e-mail me ( and let me know.

Love beyond the beyond,


PS — My brand new, integrated Ali/Alexis website is launching! For years, I had a confusing online presence with one site for my Alexis Neely media and another for the Ali/Alexis split. I was told by business coaches I needed to kill off one or hide the other. I refused, not possible, there must be another way, I said. Well, this has been the year of integration and I am so excited to show you the merger.

PPS — I made a live recording on my Facebook page about how sometimes we cut off with the intention to create more connection, why it's not working, and what we can do instead. You can watch it here.

Give It Time

Time has been on my mind this week.

Sixteen years ago, Halloween 1999, I went into the hospital, a slow leak in my amniotic sac, and the doctors decided it was time for my baby girl to be born.   28 hours later, I gave up my birth plan, and Kaia was born via C-Section on Nov 2, 1999.

Tonight, I hosted her sweet 16. My 42nd birthday is in just a few weeks.

Time is on my mind.

Did I use these years well? Could I do better?

Yes and yes.


If I had it to do all over again, knowing what I know now, I would do a lot exactly the same.

What I would do differently is stress less about not enough time and learn sooner how to better manage it.

My ability to manage time (sometimes it almost seems like bending time given how many things I am often juggling at once) could seem like a superpower, unattainable to most.

But it's not. I have created a system that is likely to quadruple your productivity while at the same time freeing up more space in your life for the things that truly nourish you.

In honor of my daughter's 16th birthday and my BIRTHday 16 years ago, its my gift to share with you my system for how to manage your time like a single mom with two businesses, two teenagers, a relationship that requires dedicated attention, and a large extended community.

Are you ready to stop feeling as if you don't have enough time and become a time ninja?

They key is a methodology I have learned called time blocking. And what it means is that EVERYTHING you need and want to go goes on your calendar.

If it's not on your calendar, it doesn't happen. Period. That includes kids activities, job duties or business tasks, massages and meals. Everything but sleep.

If someone else handles your calendar, their life is about to get way better because they'll be able to see exactly when you have blocked to schedule specific types of meetings and events that are integral to your work and life.

We have found that what works best is to create a template calendar in google calendar and share it with everyone who schedules on your calendar.

Mine looks like this.

Then, I have a calendar where things are actually scheduled.

You can see that here:

And I also have one for the kids activities.

When you look at them altogether, it could look insanely full or overwhelming, but I have found that a small amount of complexity allows me to create so much more time that it's worth it.

You are worth it.


And thanks to this time blocking I've implemented, I now typically only work from 10-6, with flexibility in the day when I need it, and time to spend with my kids, in my relationship and with my community. Plus, the ability to travel.

If you want more time, this is where you start.

I want to know what questions you have about time blocking and how you can manage your time like a ninja.

Then I'll make a training as my gift to you to ensure you don't just desire more time, but that you can actually have it.

It has been 16 years since my baby was born. And the time keeps on tickin', tickin', tickin' into the future. Let's harness that ticking and funnel it into the work you are here to do and the life you are really here to have.

What's it going to take for you to take back your most valuable asset? Seriously, let me know! E-mail in at

With so much love,